Eien Wo Shinjiteru
by bungeegum
Summary: Suffering from the aftermath of a brutal rape, Rin flees away from Sesshoumaru's care; while the demon lord struggles to understand and contain the turbulent feelings he has for his charge. Pls RnR!
1. Chapter 1

Author's Rambles: Ohayou, minna-san! Its been ages since I've written something. Now that I'm about to quit my job, I'm gonna have the time to dibble and dabble a bit. Well, here's another Sess-Rin fanfic (gad, I love those two!). Anyway, here's chap 1, I hope you guys like it. If you do (or don't), please review it anyway! All sorts of comments would be greatly appreciated, enjoy!

Oh, by the way, the title means "Believe in Forever".

Sesshoumaru-sama is so kawaii!

Whoops! Disclaimer: Sess and Rin are the brilliant creations of Takahashi Rumiko-san. I do not make any dough out of writing this, only a profound sense of satisfaction!

**Eien Wo Shinjiteru**

-o0o-

Ch 1 – Captive

The water was dreadfully cold, but she didn't really mind. She had not had a bath in 2 days, and the dust and grime of travel were beginning to bother her.

Rin reached for the small cake of lilac-scented soap and lathered her arms with it. The wondrous smell drifted up to her nostrils as she whistled a soft tune to herself. The night was beautiful, calm and serene. A bright full moon shone down on the little stream, washing the area in a soft light.

_"Hmm, where could Sesshoumaru-sama be?"_ she wondered out loud. Her Sesshoumaru-sama never bothered to tell them where he was going, or how long he would be away. But it didn't really matter though, he always came back. Always. The sixteen year-old knew in her heart that he would never ever leave them. They were family. And they would be together forever. She would always accompany him on bolder patrols like these. With Naraku long dead, there really was no reason to continue with these trips, but they've gotten so used to it, and there were always the bothersome minor youkai lurking about and they needed to be exterminated. As far as she could tell, they all enjoyed these little escapades, including her Sesshoumaru-sama, although he would die before he admitted it. She giggled at the thought. He was always so serious! She sighed contentedly, the water swirling in gentle laps around her narrow shoulders.

_"I'd better head back. Jaken-sama would scold me again if I take too long."_

Rin hurriedly rinsed the foamy lather from her body. She rose on her feet, the chilly air causing goose pimples to appear on her skin. She hastily made her way to the flat rock where her yukata was spread. Quickly donning on the silk robe, she slipped her tiny feet into her geta and started gathering her bathing things.

The sound of rustling leaves and a twig snapping behind her made her look up, thinking it was Jaken coming to fetch her. She had been gone for half an hour…he would be upset with her. It was his job to watch over her when Sesshoumaru was not around.

"Gomen-ne, Jaken-sama…the water was just so wonderful and refreshing that I didn't notice the time."

"Wonderful eh? We'll show you how to have a wonderful time, pretty lass."

Rin whirled around in surprise. The stench of rotting fish assailed her nostrils and suddenly, a bony hand clamped tightly around her mouth, cutting off a would-be scream. An arm snaked from behind her and wrapped her in a crushing grip, the breath whooshing from her. Her eyes widened in fear as another man suddenly loomed in front of her, the moonlight showing his face twisted in a sickening leer.

"I'll have her first…I got to her first, Toujo," the one behind her barked out. His breath reeked of fish, making Rin gag. It would be useless to struggle; the arms around her were like steel bands, inhibiting movement. She must not give in to panic. Jaken-sama and Aun were nearby, they would hear these bandits and come to her rescue. Unbidden scenes from her childhood suddenly flashed through her mind, memories she thought would never surface again…Oto-san, Okaa-san, and her dear Onii-san…all slaughtered like cattle by evil men. Evil men like these. Evil men who had her at their mercy. She was going to meet the same fate just like them.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever! You always have them first…you're a mean one, Karasu." the second man gritted out, his lips turning down in a childish pout. He was short and stocky, and his huge swollen lips, reminded Rin absurdly of a puffer fish she had seen when she was a child. "Don't use her too hard though. This one looks different from the rest, prettier and tastier, I'll bet. And she smells so damn good too! She will be quite the feast!"

_They were going to eat her?_

"I will let go of your mouth, but if you scream, I will slit your throat, just like a pig, understand?" the one behind her rasped out. Rin nodded fearfully, tears starting to sting her eyes.

The second man, the one called Toujo, reached into his pocket and pulled something out. Grinning wickedly he roughly stuffed a filthy piece of cloth into her mouth. To scream for help was impossible. Then her arms were painfully pulled behind her back and was quickly bound by a leather thong. Karasu started dragging her toward the forest, his partner falling into step beside them. And they were heading away from the clearing her companions were in.

Rin began to struggle futilely. They were kidnapping her! She must escape! Toujo raised his arm and slapped her on the face hard, causing her head to snap sideways and splitting her lip. The tears hovering on the edge of her eyes began to fall.

"Cease bitch! Or we'll have you right here, right now!"

Rin began to see stars. What did he mean by we'll have you right here? Surely they meant to cook her first. They would truss her up and roast her on a spit, over a slow fire. Just like the hare they had for dinner not too long ago. She shook her head wildly, she was not thinking clearly! _These men were obviously…cannibals._ She had heard stories of such barbaric men and their abhorrent practices from Jaken-sama, but she never believed they could actually be true. She did not want to be cooked over a fire! The idea was too horrible to contemplate! She always knew she was mortal, but she imagined she would die an old woman…with her Sesshoumaru-sama at her side. Her Sesshoumaru-sama! _She would never be able to see her beloved Sesshoumaru-sama ever again!_ Somehow, she must escape. But how?

Karasu hoisted her up on his shoulder. Rin's stomach dug painfully into sharp bone, making her whimper. The thong was bound too securely as well, her wrists were raw from being chafed. The awful man was running now, his breath coming in short gasps. At last, they reached a small clump of trees, and she was unceremoniously dumped on the solid ground. She landed hard on her arms, making her tears gush harder.

"Well, little flower, what shall we do with you first?"

The moonlight shone directly on Karasu and for the first time, she saw the face of her captor. He was the opposite of Toujo in appearance. Tall and scrawny-looking, his eyes were narrowed into mean black slits, like a venomous snake, and they gradually widened now as they roved hungrily all over her body. Rin realized that her yukata was gaping open, exposing one full breast. With a small cry she jerked up into a sitting position and tried to scramble frantically away from the terrible pair, until her back touched the trunk of a tree. Her eyes snapped back to the pudgy Toujo, who was ogling her the same way. Rin opened her mouth to scream, but the only sound that came out was a tiny croak. She cleared her throat painfully. With all the courage she could muster, she lifted her chin and glared defiantly at both of her captors. In a slightly quivering voice, she said, "My Sesshoumaru-sama will come for me…and when he gets here, you will be sorry you ever laid eyes on me."

"There's no one around for miles, my poppet," Karasu replied giddily. "There's just us, and yes, we want to hear you scream, so scream all you want! Toujo and I like our women loud!" His eyes glinted with an evil light.

Slowly, deliberately, they advanced on her, making her feel as if she was a cornered prey, and they were her predators. She thought of the hare again…_so this is how it must have felt._ She must say something to stall them.

"You haven't made the fire yet."

The two men looked incredulously at her and then at each other. "What fire?" they asked at the same time.

Rin frowned in confusion. "The fire you're going to use for cooking me." If the situation wasn't so terrible she would have laughed at how absurd she sounded. The fire would take some time to build, and by the time they were done, Sesshoumaru-sama would be here to save her!

Toujo and Karasu began to howl with laughter. The pudgy man began slapping his mate at the back. "You got us a good one, eh! Obviously, she's never known a man, or she's just plain dumb!"

_Whatever on earth did they intend to do with her?_

Karasu abruptly stopped laughing and turned to look at her. He brought a hand up to signal Toujo to cease. "You're trying to stall for time, aren't you? Toujo, remove the thong and hold her arms above her head…as I've said earlier, I will have her first."

-o0o-

Author's Rambles: Alrighty, that's it! I hope you guys enjoyed chapter 1! Please read and review. I would appreciate anything, as in anything you would have to say. Sesshoumaru would be in the next chap…

Thankies!

Ja ne!

bungeegum


	2. Chapter 2

**Writer's Yaps:** Hey guys! Sorry I took such a long time to update. Things have been pretty hectic around the house. Truth is, I don't really know where this story's headed, although I've got several cool plots in my head right now. Oh well, as I always say, anything goes!

Thanks for the reviews you guys…you make my day!

Please continue reading and reviewing…hahaha!

Here ya go, chapter 2 of Eien Wo Shinjiteru!

**Chapter 2**

Senjitsu Ayume was a light sleeper. She was accustomed to the common sounds of the night: the crickets chirping in the trees, the trickling of the mountain spring nearby, the rustling of the grass as they swayed gently in the breeze. Her husband Minoru, however, slept like the dead, and he could only be roused by a bucket of cold water.

This night seemed no different from the rest of the nights on this side of the mountain. She and her husband were alone, their nearest neighbors could be found far down the valley below, which was convenient for them. They did not have to contend with anybody else for anything. Theirs was a simple, quiet life.

Ayume's eyes suddenly opened. Something was not right. She glanced at her husband snoring softly beside her. Nothing wrong there. _Ah, it must be the rain then_. The ceaseless patter of drops on the roof must have woke her up. She liked it when it rained at night, the sound was comforting, lulling you to sleep. Ayume's forehead wrinkled in a frown. Slowly, she sat up. There was something a else, _a presence_…gooseflesh appeared on her arms. _It was getting closer_.

A sudden flash of light outside made her head turn toward the window. _Lightning?_ She cocked her head, waiting for the rumble of thunder that usually follows. A few seconds, no thunder. Hastily, she slipped out of the blanket and crossed over to the door in her tabi. She pushed the flap aside. There was someone standing by the well.

Nobody knew they lived up here. Their children were all dead, no one has come to visit in years. Travelers usually avoided this area because of the rocky terrain. She was surprised…a visitor in the middle of the night. Somehow, the thought made her smile. A man, no it was not a man, for he was surrounded by a bluish white light. The light served as a shield from the rain, it was as if he had a roof over his head. It must be a _kami_ then. No, it couldn't be possible. She had ceased to believe in gods when her children were butchered by a roving band of youkai. She strained her eyes. The glow made it hard for her to see his features. The presence had a bundle in his arms. It began to walk towards her. Every step he took brought him closer.

He was magnificent. He must be royalty then, for his kimono and _hakama_ were of the finest silk, there were three swords strapped to his hip, his armor gleaming in the pale wash of the moon. His long silver hair fluttered lightly in the breeze. _Silver? He could not possibly be human_. He stopped when he was three feet in front of her. Ayume knew she should have been frightened, but for some reason, she was not. The feral amber eyes flared with a strange fire, and they were focused directly on her.

"This girl needs human attention. Do whatever is necessary."

-o0o-

Judging by the severity of her injuries, the girl had been raped, repeatedly. By two or three men. Her small, fragile body was littered with nasty cuts, welts and bruises. Her lip was split, and there was an angry gash on her temple, probably caused by a sharp rock. The girl had been used, brutally. It's a miracle she was still alive.

Ayume gently wiped the dirt off the girl's face with a clean washcloth. She was a very beautiful girl. She had an oval face, high, delicate cheekbones, a small, slightly upturned nose, and tiny, heart-shaped lips. Porcelain skin, as soft as silk, like a butterfly's wings. Her hair was a thick, lustrous ebony mass scattered all over her pillow. She was clearly a highborn lady. The silk of her kimono was truly the finest. It was such a pity, what she had been through. The world was a cold, unfeeling place…cruel.

The girl…her father has yet to reveal her name (he had not uttered a single word since) was still sound asleep. She had been asleep when she was brought in, obviously exhausted after her terrifying ordeal. The girl's father…no, he couldn't be her father. He looked so young to have fathered a teenage daughter, although there was a timeless quality to his appearance. He must be her guardian then, or her husband.

Ayume set her medicine kit aside. There was nothing more she could do. All they can do now was to wait for the girl to wake up and pray that her mind had not been altered by what befell her. She had encountered a rape victim before, and the unfortunate woman had never been the same after the incident. She had gone mad.

Her husband was out in the woodpile gathering wood for the dwindling fire. Ayume rose slowly to her feet and headed for the door. Her eyes scanned the yard until they rested on the motionless figure of the girl's guardian. He was just standing by the well, looking up at the heavens. The torrential rain had mellowed down to a drizzle. She went back in and retrieved an umbrella. Her husband entered then, carrying an armload of firewood. "That girl's companion is still out there. I'm going to call him in, he might get the chills." Minoru nodded silently and proceeded to fill the wood box. He was a man of few words.

Ayume hurried outside with the umbrella over her head. When she was standing right next to Sesshoumaru, she said, "She is going to be just fine. Come in out of the rain. You might get ill yourself."

Sesshoumaru did not reply. His insides were still seething with rage. It was roiling around in his system, making him feel as if he would spill his guts any moment now. And the guilt. That was even worse. This would not have happened if Rin was left behind at the castle, where she belonged. She was all grown up now, she shouldn't have been traipsing around the countryside with him. He had never realized the danger, how vulnerable a little slip of a girl can be. She had been ravaged by barbarians. Ravaged. His Rin. His poor little Rin. She was so full of life, so trusting. She would be different now. _Would she hate him?_ Sesshoumaru closed his eyes. He _cannot_ dwell on that right now.

_Poor man, how he suffers. _Ayume could feel the wrath emanating from him in waves. The feeling was so strong it was almost tangible. With a weary sigh, Ayume turned and started to walk back to the hut. "Come inside where its warm. My husband is making some broth if you're hungry. I'm telling you, she's going to be fine," she said over her shoulder.

_Those savages. They would pay for what they did to her. Death would not be enough._ Without thinking Sesshoumaru rose up into the air, transforming into his real form as he did so.

Ayume turned around, startled by the dazzling white light emitted by the stranger. In front of her astonished eyes he turned into a majestic, giant dog and flew swiftly away. His passing left the night looking even darker than before. So he was a youkai after all, or a _daiyoukai_, if she was not mistaken. Those men who hurt the little girl would not live to see the dawn. Which is more than they deserve.

-o0o-

Whooheee! That's chapter 2 for you! I promise I'll try to update sooner! Please RnR!

Til next time, genki-de!

-bungeegum-


	3. Chapter 3

**Writer's Yaps**: Ok, I know this chap is really short, I've been pretty busy lately. I've begun chapter 4 so please watch out for that in a few days. Please still take the time to read this. I'm still not sure how Rin would react to Sesshoumaru when she wakes up. Haha!

Thanks for all the reviews minna-san! I'm still open for suggestions…enjoy!

-o0o-

Chapter 3

She was lying on the ground when he found her. The rain was beating down on her frail body and the water had washed the dirt off of her, making her appear ghostly white. Her eyes were closed and her tattered kimono barely covered her ravished nakedness. She was mindless of the cold, and her stillness made it seem as if she was already dead. But he could tell that she was not.

Sesshoumaru enfolded Rin in his arms and surrounded them with a barrier to keep the rain out. He wrapped her gently in his fur stole, carefully sensing that she did not have any broken bones. Her eyes fluttered for a moment but they did not open. He wanted to ask her if she was alright, but he did not want to wake her. When he thought of the hell his Rin had been through, he wanted to kill.

He had hacked their limbs off and blinded them, their arms and legs severed viciously from their bodies. And with his _Meidou Zangetsouha_, he had sent them straight to the fires of hell, while they still had breath in their bodies. Those despicable bastards would be wandering the world of the dead maimed and unseeing. Their cries would have doubtless been pitiful, and it won't be long until a monstrous fiend came and fed on their sorry flesh, which is more than they deserve. He had the uncontrollable urge to finish them off immediately, but he stayed his hand. It would have been an unjust punishment. They should have been tortured for all eternity.

Now he must go back. He felt a chill run through his entire being. What was it? Sesshoumaru closed his eyes for a moment. _Trepidation_, yes, that was it. There was a sour taste in his mouth. His eyes snapped open in alarm. He was dreading the thought of facing her.

Gathering his whirlwind cloud, he rose up into the air.

-o0o-

"Riiiin! Sesshoumaru-sama!"

Startled, Ayume shot to her feet. The girl had not awakened. She headed for the door and looked out. A two-headed horse was standing next to the cherry tree. _A two-headed horse?_ It looked more like a beast of some sort, a dragon maybe. What was it doing here? And that voice she heard…whose was it? That horse couldn't have talked, could it? Ayume squinted, for the night and the drizzle made it hard to see. There was something sitting atop the creature. And it resembled a toad. _A toad?_ What on earth was going on? First, a _daiyoukai_ and a girl appear on her doorstep, and now these?

The toad spied her standing just inside the door. It jumped to the ground and began walking awkwardly towards her, waving a stick in the air. "You!" it pointed an accusing finger at her. "Where are Rin and Sesshoumaru-sama?" It started to run. His short legs caught on the hem of his robes, causing him to trip. He cursed as he launched himself up.

Ayume continued to stare. She assumed that the toad was referring to the girl in her care (Rin) and the daiyoukai (Sesshoumaru-sama). So this creature was probably their companion, or more like a servant perhaps.

"The girl is inside, resting. Your master however is…" the sentence was left hanging as the servant gave a loud yelp and rushed to the girl's side.

'Rin, what happened to you? I'm so sorry, Sesshoumaru-sama would kill me for letting this happen to you…oh, Rin. Poor, poor Rin!"

He was clearly distraught. Tears had gathered at the corners of his eyes. Jaken whirled to face Ayume and demanded, "What happened to Rin?"

"She had been raped. This Sesshoumaru-sama you speak of has left to find the ones who did this to her."

Jaken could not speak. He turned to look at Rin. It was his fault. He shouldn't have left Rin alone like that. His tears started to gush down in hot streaks. Rin…he never really liked her…or didn't he? She did not deserve this. Sesshoumaru-sama would surely kill him for this. And his death would not be swift.

"Do you have a name, youkai?"

Jaken swallowed the lump in his throat. Strangely he felt like weeping. Rin looked so pale, so cold…_she looked_ _dead_. "J-J-Jaken," he said simply. His Nintoujo slipped from his grasp and clattered to the floor, then he fell on his knees and began to cry.

"Oh hush, now, she's going to be fine." Ayume watched the poor toad with some concern. They have all been through a terrible ordeal. Her glance strayed to her husband. He was gazing at Rin with a woeful expression. That's right, their daughter Nana, would have been Rin's age now, if she had lived. Youkai had slaughtered her children, and now she was caring for a youkai's ward. How ironic life was. She sighed inwardly. They must all get some rest, it would be dawn soon. And _he _would be back.

-o0o-

Chap 4 would be posted in a few days. Please RnR!

Genki-de, ja ne!

-bungeegum-


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Yaps:** Hey minna-san! I know I took forever to update. I'm hoping you still take the time to read and review it though. I am very much open to suggestions and any whatnot you can give me. Hehe!

Thank you for all your reviews. You guys brighten my day!

**Chapter 4**

It was stiflingly warm. She recalled Jaken-sama's stories about hell, that it was an unbearable furnace, full of flesh-eating youkai and restless spirits. Was she in hell then? It certainly felt like it.

Rin opened her eyes. She was lying on a straw mat, with a thick blanket wrapped tightly around her. She tried to sit up, but a sharp pain in her side made her wince and lie back down. She surveyed her surroundings. As far as she could tell she was inside a villager's hut. The house was made of straw and bamboo. There was a healthy fire in the hearth with a soup pot suspended above, it's contents bubbling merrily. Where was she? She could not remember anything. What was she doing in a place like this? Where was everybody…Jaken-sama and Ah-Un? Her Sesshoumaru-sama? Surely they had not left her behind. She shuddered at the thought. Surely they would never do that to her. They were family. They must have left her here to recuperate from whatever ailed her. Her body was sore in different places, especially between her legs. She raised her hands to her face. There were scratches on them, but they were no longer bleeding.

"Ah, so you're finally awake. How are you feeling little girl?"

Rin's head snapped toward the one who spoke. There was a hulking figure standing just inside the door. She could not see his face, the sunlight was glaringly bright behind him. She blinked. He started moving towards her, limping slightly and taking long measured strides. Her brow furrowed in confusion. And suddenly, it hit her. Like an avalanche without warning, it all came flooding back.

**-o0o-**

Ayume scrambled to her feet the instant she heard the girl cry out. She paid no heed to her vegetable basket as it toppled to the dust. Frantically, she rushed over to the hut. Her heart leaped to her throat. What had made the girl scream like that? She burst through the door.

Her husband Minoru was standing by the hearth with his palms held out. There was a look of dismay on his face as his gaze shifted to her. "She's afraid of me. She thinks I'm her attacker. The poor girl."

Ayume turned to look at Rin. She was hunched down by the corner, trying to squeeze herself into the wall. Those eyes of hers were filled with something akin to terror and she was moaning piteously. Ayume's heart went out to the her. "Go and get the toad. He's in the barn tending to the horse." Minoru nodded and hurried to obey.

Ayume approached Rin cautiously, with slow measured steps. "Hush now, my child. You are safe with us. The bad men are not here. They can no longer hurt you." She crouched down next to the frightened girl and touched her face gently. Rin had stopped whimpering, and was now eyeing her warily. She had soft brown eyes, the color of cinnamon. Her daughter Nishi, had eyes like that, only Rin's was of a darker shade. How peculiar that the memory of her child rose at a time like this. She swallowed the lump in her throat and attempted a wavering smile for the girl's benefit.

"That man who was here, he is my husband, and he would never hurt you. He went to call your companion, the little toad. You are safe now child, safe with us." She enfolded Rin in her arms, rocking her back and forth soothingly.

Rin clutched the older woman tightly, as if holding on for dear life. She began to shake uncontrollably, the pain in her chest was so acute she found it difficult to breathe. In a small, shaking voice, she said, "He never came. He never came for me. I kept on calling for him, but he never came. While those men were doing those things to me, I called out to him countless times, until I couldn't scream anymore. I-I…".

Ayume held her closer. Surely the girl was referring to her silver-haired guardian. The daiyoukai, Sesshoumaru. He still had not returned. Ayume wondered what was keeping him. He should have caught up with the heartless bastards some time ago and he should have been back by now. "Shh, hush now, my child. You must not think about that right now. Everything will be fine. I'll make sure of that. Now, we must get you something to eat, you must be hungry hmm?"

Rin shook her head. Her mouth gaped open in a silent scream as memories of that night mercilessly paraded across her mind. She brought her fist to her mouth and bit down hard to keep from crying out. Somehow, she knew in her heart that he was not to blame. She shouldn't have strayed too far from the camp. But the agonizing pain would not go away. Everything was too fresh, too raw. She did not fully understand what had happened to her. All she knew was that she felt violated and unclean. She would go mad, she was sure of it. How could he? How could he allow that thing to happen? He had never failed her before…never. Her Sesshoumaru–sama always made things right. She should have died that night. There was nothing worse than this sick feeling of betrayal and abandonment that welled up from the depths of her entire being. Yes, she should have died that night. What was she thinking? She had known it all along. She would cease to exist, while he would go on living. Living without her. Up until this moment, she had refused to let that terrible realization cow her. They would be together forever. She had made that vow to herself so long ago. But now it was here, and it had unknowingly sneaked up on her so fast it was like a slap in the face. In a blinding flash, the world she had known and held dear had gone spiraling down into a murky darkness, where everything was unclear and uncertain. It would all be different now. Tears of despair slid silently down her cheeks.

**-o0o-**

The guilt was eating at him, painstakingly devouring him alive, bit by bit. It had not eased with the death of those bastards, as he knew it would not. And the _fear_. Rin had such unfailing faith in him, and it was killing him to know that this unbreakable trust had been shattered. He had _failed_ her. He was deathly afraid she would turn him away and refuse to see him. He could not blame her if she did. No, that would not be possible. From this day on, he would _never_ let her out of his sight. Nothing else mattered anymore, nothing…except his precious Rin. Perhaps, she would find it in her heart to forgive him, for he knew that he would never be able to forgive himself. Sesshoumaru closed his eyes and steeled himself for what was to come.

**-o0o-**

Ok that's it for chappie 4. In my opinion, this chap is really bad, it lacks a certain oomph. I'll fix this up when I get the time. As for the next one, it will be posted sometime this week. I'm still not sure where I'm heading with this fic. I've made up some of the scenes in my mind but so far, nothing concrete. Sorry about the delays, hehehe!

Oh yeah, those reviews, please keep 'em coming!

-bungeegum-


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Babbles**: Gosh, I took so long to update, sorry about that. I just haven't had the spirit to go on with this, hehe! Didn't want to leave you guys hanging though. Thanks for all your reviews, they warm up my heart. I'll try to update sooner next time.

Please don't get tired of reviewing, arigato!

Chapter 5

Spring had always been Senjitsu Ayume's favorite season. At this time of year, the trees were budding, leaves started to unfurl from sturdy young branches. The flowers were at their most glorious, the hillside would be blanketed with a riot of colors and textures. And it was during the spring that the birds seemed at their happiest. You could hear them singing and chirping all day long. In the winter, all you could hear were the gloomy hoot of an owl and the lonely baying of wolves. She had always looked forward to springtime. This way, she can leave the woes of winter behind, at least for a time. Ayume remembered her children the most during the snowy months. And the bleak frost and bitter bite of the chilly winds always made the pain seem more acute. The heartache caused by their passing was heightened by the lonesomeness of their barren existence. Spring however, was a season of joy, a time of rebirth, a celebration of new life. Her children would never return to her, but spring has given her the notion that they were someplace else, living a wonderful life.

The child in her arms had been through perhaps the worst winter of her life. The blizzard and the avalanche in the form of those atrocious men had destroyed her innocence and shattered her illusions. Ayume was determined to help Rin get her life back. She had known the girl for only a few moments, but the bond she felt with her was so astonishingly keen that it seemed as if the she was hers. Her daughter Nishi, would have been Rin's age by now. They had both suffered a devastating loss. Perhaps, Rin's spirit would never be completely well again, but that would be determined by time. On this fine spring day, they would begin trudging the road to being healed.

Ayume glanced down at Rin. The girl's eyes were closed, but she knew she was not asleep, for her hands were still gripping the front of her kimono.

A shadow from the doorway blocked the sunlight from entering the room. Ayume looked up to see the figure of the youkai lord standing at the entrance.

"Rin, your guardian is here to see you now," Ayume said softly. Gently, she disengaged herself from Rin's embrace.

Rin nooded mutely. She opened her eyes and reached for Ayume's hand. "I'm sorry, but you have not told me your name," she said tremulously.

"My name is Ayume, Rin-chan. Now I must leave you two alone." She squeezed Rin's hand reassuringly.

Rin squeezed back and gave her a small, sad smile. "Thank you for everything, Ayume-san. I owe you my life."

"You owe me nothing, little girl. Now, I must go, I will see you later." And with that, she stood and headed towards the door.

The daiyoukai stepped aside to let her pass. His face was as she remembered it: blank and impassive.

Sesshoumaru did not even spare a glance at Ayume on her way out. He had eyes only for Rin, _his Rin_. She was hunched on the floor with her back to him, her head bowed so he could not see her face. Silently, he walked towards her until he was only a few feet away. He got down on one knee and lifted his hand as if to touch her. But he hesitated and asked her instead, "How are you feeling?"

Rin did not answer. She continued to stare at the floor. Sesshoumaru reached out to touch her again. He wanted to reassure himself that she was fine, at least from any physical injury she had sustained, but her words made his hand freeze in mid-air.

"Please don't."

Rin found that she could not look at him. She clutched the sash of her kimono and restlessly twisted it in her small hands. If she looked at him, she would surely break down, and if he touched her, _by god she would fall apart_. With a small cry Rin scrambled to her feet and frantically dashed to the other side of the room. She was breathing hard, and the ominous weight of his presence was threatening to crush her.

Sesshoumaru had not moved. And for a few moments he stayed motionless. Slowly, he rose to his feet. His hands were clenched at his sides. This was not the way he thought Rin would react. His head was reeling with uncertainty. He was not sure how to respond.

"I want you to know that I do not blame you for what happened. You have always been there for me. It was just unfortunate that this had to happen." Rin spoke softly. Her tone was far from accusatory, in fact it was so devoid of emotion that the words rang hollowly in his ears, sending chills coursing down his spine. Finally, she looked at him. There was no light in her eyes. She had no more tears left to shed, it seemed. The Rin he knew had died last night. The woman standing before him was a ghost, a mere shell of the carefree and happy girl Rin had once been.

Sesshoumaru swallowed at the lump forming in his throat.

"I know that if you could have been there, you would not have let anything happen to me. But it did, and there is nothing we can do to change it."

Rin smiled wanly as she continued, "The truth is, I am feeling such shame right now, although I do not understand why." At this time, tears had gathered at the corners of her eyes. "I should have died. I truly wish I had died."

Sesshoumaru shook his head. He wanted to wrap her in his arms and tell her that everything would be fine. She was safe now. But he found that he was powerless to move and that his tongue failed him.

A heavy silence hung in the air. Rin turned to stare at the fire in the hearth. "I would like to rest now."

Sesshoumaru nodded. He left the room as quietly as he had come.

The tears began to roll down Rin's cheeks as she collapsed to the floor. She bit her lower lip hard to keep from crying out. Her heart was breaking in a thousand pieces. Why did this have to happen?

-o0o-

Chap 6 will be up soon, I promise!

Ja ne!


	6. Chapter 6

**I originally posted chapter 6 yesterday but I made a few revisions. Here's the real thing…for those of you who have already read the unrevised one, please take the time to go over this because I believe it's much better, more dramatic. Hehe! Thanks a lot, and enjoy!**

**Writer's Yaps:** Hey you guys! I know I take such a looong time to update between chapters. Sorry about that, it's just that I don't feel like writing sometimes or I'm too lazy to turn on the PC or there's just so much to do around here (which isn't true most of the time, haha). Haha, I am gonna finish this story though. Please oh please feel free to say whatever you want about this. Thanks for all the reviews, I really can't say how much I appreciate you guys taking the time to say what you think, and for all the praise and encouragement, I love it all hehehe! Anyway, I'm babbling again so here goes, enjoy!

**Eien Wo Shinjiteru**

**Chapter 6**

The heavy mist made it very difficult to see what was ahead. The ghostly outlines of the trees, the strange hoot of an owl, and the yapping of coyotes from a distance sent shivers down her spine. Rin wrapped her cloak more tightly about her and increased her grip on the pommel on Ah-Un's back.

They had been traveling for several days now. And in that time, everyone barely said a word. They were going at a slow but steady pace, stopping frequently due to her condition. Her Sesshoumaru-sama was some distance directly ahead of them, scouting for danger. The forest was relatively peaceful, but he didn't want to take any chances. Not after what happened.

Jaken was plodding steadily along beside the youkai dragon. The green toad only spoke to her when it was necessary, It was in his nature to scold her and berate her for practically every little thing she did, but in light of everything she had gone through, he kept his mouth shut. From time to time, he looked up at her and there was always a mixture of pity and concern in his glances that was making Rin increasingly uncomfortable. She wanted to tell him she was all right, but didn't have the heart to.

As for Sesshoumaru, he never once uttered a single word to her. On the duration of their journey, she rarely saw him at all. He would always be in front of the team, and he would seldom appear when they stopped along the way. She knew he was there though. His presence was unmistakable.

A strong gust of wind blew in from the west, whipping the hood from her head. The air was heavy with the scent of an oncoming storm. Rin shut her eyes and tried not to think, thunderstorms would always remind her of that night. Suddenly she was overcome by a huge wave of exhaustion. She slumped in her seat and didn't bother to push her hood up. The icy wind was like a hundred little knives lashing at her hair and face, but she did not mind the pain, in fact, she welcomed it.

The figure of Sesshoumaru suddenly materialized out of the swirling fog. He looked at Jaken and said, "There is a cave not far from here. We will stop there for the night."

**-o0o-**

Jaken had made a healthy, roaring fire. He was roasting some mushrooms for their meal. Outside, the storm was raging on, but they were safe in the confines of the cave.

After giving Jaken specific instructions and with not so much as a look in her direction, Sesshoumaru headed for the exit.

Rin turned over in her pallet to face the wall and closed her eyes. He was going away again. Whenever they made a stopover Sesshoumaru stayed out of sight of the camp. She knew he would just be somewhere nearby, but every time he left it made her feel like she was being abandoned all over again. Shivering uncontrollably in spite of the heat in the cavern, Rin curled into a tight ball . The chill she felt was in her bones and no amount of heat can ever make her warm again.

In the next moment, she felt something soft and thick being draped over her body. She opened her eyes slowly and looked over her shoulder to see Sesshoumaru walking away. He had covered her in his fur stole.

**-o0o-**

The gales continued to plunder across the land, and the rain battered on mercilessly. Sesshoumaru gazed up into the ink black sky. Ever since they left the peasant hut, his mind had been a mass of turbulent, nameless emotions. Seeing Rin as she was now, evoked feelings of utter helplessness and sheer rage. His thoughts drifted to that day over a week ago.

"_It has been difficult this past two weeks, but in that short period of time, my husband and I have grown very fond of the child."_

_Failing to evoke a response from him, Ayume pressed on determinedly, "She is at a difficult phase in her life right now. When I ask her about you she looks away and changes the subject. I know that you care for her in your own way. But as she is just a little girl and she needs to be with her own kind. It would be good if she stayed with us for a while. We can see that she is happy here. It would be good for her recovery."_

_The last rays of the sun had sunk behind the violet mountains. Sesshoumaru was in a pensive mood as he gazed off into the distance. It had been over a week since the incident. In all that time, Rin had barely said a word to him, nor had she made an attempt to. In other words, she had done her best to avoid him. He could say the same for himself, as he usually was not around enough for her to strike up a conversation. But whenever he was near, she eluded him like the plague._

_Sesshoumaru did not want to admit it to himself, but her continued avoidance bothered him. It irked him in such a way that he wanted to strike the woman before him for daring to suggest such an absurd request. Rin was _his_ charge. But that was a decision Rin had to make herself._

"_What if is she is with child?"_

_The question sent Sesshoumaru's senses reeling with shock. And for a moment a shadow of an unnamed emotion flickered behind his eyes-was it fear, trepidation, or something else entirely? But it was instantly quelled. The fists clenched at his sides was the only sign she could see that he was even listening to her. Seeing this encouraged Ayume to press further, "I've had several children myself. I think it would be more beneficial for Rin if she stayed here for the time being, or until the child is grown, if there is one. I promise my husband and I will care for them as if they were our own."_

_With an outward calm that belied his inner turmoil, Sesshoumaru turned his gaze to the west, where the sun was nowhere to be seen. "That is none of your concern, woman." _

**-o0o-**

Rin had chosen to stay with him, for reasons he could not understand. He could barely contain his relief when she announced in a small voice that she was ready to head on home.

Humans must feel cold whenever they were out in a storm like this, but as a youkai, he was immune to such. For the first time in his life, he wanted to feel the bite of the wind, the icy lash of the driving rain, for the chill to seep into his bones. He realized then that he had been standing like this for hours. Time held little essence for him, for he was immortal.

**-o0o-**

It was dark. The blackness was so absolute she couldn't see her hand in front of her. It pulsed as if it was living, tangible thing that enveloped her. It was getting harder and harder to breathe. Suddenly, something latched onto her ankle. She let out a horrified scream. Jerking her legs violently, she tried to dislodge it, but it's grip was like iron. She pushed her arms forward and seized it, trying to pry the fingers off one by one. At once more hands came out of nowhere, grabbing her legs, pulling her hair, scratching at her face. They were all over her body. Quaking in terror, she opened her mouth to cry for help, but she was slapped brutally in the face by a bony hand. _She was going to die_.

**-o0o-**

"Rin! Rin-chan!"

Rin was whimpering and tears coursed down her cheeks as she thrashed wildly about in her pallet. Jaken shook her harder but she would not wake up.

"Rin! Please wake up!" He was going to cry. Poor Rin-chan! He had no idea what to do. He wrung his hands helplessly.

"Stand aside."

The quietly spoken command caused Jaken to jump in fright, then he let out a sigh of profound relief as he realized that Sesshoumaru-sama had returned. He scrambled away, watching Rin worriedly.

The demon lord knelt by the pallet and gathered Rin in his arms. In the next instant her eyes opened. Upon feeling the arms encircling her she let out a scream of such fear and began pummeling his chest. "Let go of me! Don't touch me!" She began to sob uncontrollably, heaving spasms rocking her entire body.

Sesshoumaru continued to hold her. "Hush now Rin. It's me," he said in a soft voice. She had been in the throes of a terrible nightmare. If he could, he would transfer all the pain and anguish inside her into himself. He wanted to feel, even a fraction of the pain she was feeling right now. Then she would know that she didn't have to go through it alone. One of his hands stroked her hair soothingly while the other clutched her tightly to him. Somehow, he would make it right.

**-o0o-**

Ok, that was another short chappie. I can't promise this is gonna be updated soon as I'll be busy for the next couple of days. Sorry about that guys. I hope you still take the time to read and review though. See ya!

Ja ne!

-bungeegum-


	7. Chapter 7

**Writer's Yaps:** Hey minna-san! I would so like to thank you for all the encouraging reviews. You guys have given me something to smile about, hehe! By the way, some of you may have noticed that Sesshoumaru-sama has both arms in this story, and you could be wondering why that is (thanks for bringing that up, **Hitokiri Yukihime**!). Well, he acquired his other arm in my other fic **Kanjou no Setsuna**, but only the first chapter is posted here in It's unfinished and I don't think I will be posting the rest of it (unless you want me to!). Anyway, here's chapter 7, and as I've said, Inuyasha and the gang are now part of the cast.

As always, please feel free to tell me what you think! Thanks again I hope you enjoy this. It's the longest chap I've written so far.

**Eien Wo Shinjiteru**

**Chapter 7**

The girl was curled up on her side and was fast asleep. She did not stir when he walked up to the fire and fed more sticks to the dwindling flames.

She was facing the wall so her face was hidden from his view. Her slim form was clad in a red, embroidered kimono of the finest silk, but the cloth was stained with so much dirt and grime that you wouldn't notice it's quality at first glance. The pack of coyotes had given her a terrible fright. She had fainted in his arms and he had carried her to this enclosed outcropping at the side of the mountain. She had yet to awake from her deep slumber.

Kohaku ate the last of the mushrooms he had roasted for an early supper. He had debated waking the girl for the meal but she was sleeping so peacefully he decided against it. He had been busily trapping fish in the river when he heard her scream from faraway, and he had come hurtling through the woods to get where she was. She was wielding a broken tree branch, swinging it wildly form side to side as she tried to ward off half a dozen viciously snarling dogs that were snapping at her heels. After scaring the coyotes away, he came up to her to ask if she was alright, but her eyes had rolled to the back of her head and Kohaku caught her just before she hit the ground.

He couldn't shake the feeling that he had seen her somewhere before, but her face eluded him. She wasn't a peasant girl, of that he was certain. And it wasn't just because of her rich garments, or the fact that she was breathtakingly beautiful. Her ebony hair was soft and lustrous, and her skin was as smooth and fine as the silk she wore. She was probably the wife or daughter of a wealthy nobleman. What was she doing in the middle of the woods, Kohaku could not begin to fathom. Well, he would find out when she wakes, but right now he had to be heading on home. Sango would skin his hide if he was late for supper.

With a sigh, Kohaku gently hoisted the girl onto his back and started the long walk back to the house.

**-o0o-**

"Good heavens, Kohaku! What have you got there?"

Gently, so as not to wake her, Kohaku set the girl down on the pallet and turned to face the group. They were gawking at him in such a way that it was almost comical. He cleared his throat to keep from laughing. "I, uh, found her in the forest."

Inuyasha threw back his head and roared with laughter. "Kohaku, it's about time you snagged yourself a woman," he said with a smirk. "You've got pretty good taste, as far as I can tell."

"Inuyasha, osuwa-!"

His face red, Kohaku clapped his hand over Kagome's mouth. "I'm sorry, Kagome-sama," he said solemnly, at the same time quickly retrieving his arm. "But the sound of the crash might wake her."

Kagome nodded sheepishly. "Oh sorry, I wasn't thinking." She sent Inuyasha a withering glare. "I'm gonna go get a blanket for her," she announced and flounced out of the room.

"She doesn't appear to be hurt. Can you tell us what happened?" Sango's brow furrowed in concern.

Miroku peered over Kohaku's shoulder at the sleeping girl. "Hmm, Inuyasha's right, she is one fine looking female." His hand absently wandered down to caress Sango's bottom.

Sango gritted her teeth and conked the priest in the head in annoyance. "Behave yourself," she commanded. She turned to Kohaku and smiled at him. "Can you tell us what happened?" she asked again.

Kohaku gestured them all out of the room. "I'll tell you over supper," he said.

Kagome came back bearing the blanket. She knelt down next to the girl and covered her with it. As she smoothed the girl's hair away from her forehead, she gasped in shock.

Everyone's heads swiveled in her direction. "What is it?" Sango asked, a trace of alarm in her voice.

Kagome looked up at them, her face registering her astonishment. "It's Rin. This girl...it's Rin!"

**-o0o-**

Rin woke to the sound of hushed voices. She was lying on a soft pallet and was wrapped in a thick quilt. Pulling herself up in a sitting position, she took a moment to survey her surroundings. She was in a room somewhere, and she couldn't remember how she got here. She vaguely recalled being chased by wolves, or was it coyotes? She was running for her life, all of a sudden _he_ was there, and then everything went black.

Rin brought her hand to her mouth to keep from gasping. It was the boy, he had brought her here, she was sure if it. But where was he? There was a clean kimono and undergarments at the foot of her pallet. Hurriedly, she stripped off her soiled clothing and put on them on. The clean cotton felt and smelled wonderful.

There were people in the room across the hall, their voices barely audible. His family perhaps? Opening the door silently, she ventured out into the corridor. Careful not to make any noise, she padded over to the shoji and strained to listen. She could just make out what they were saying, and the strange thing was, they seemed to know who she was. As the conversation wore on, her eyes widened as one voice stood out from the rest. She would recognize that voice anywhere, it was the impatient tones of Sesshoumaru-sama's half-brother Inuyasha! She had stumbled upon Inuyasha and his friends!

-o0o-

"I wonder what happened? Do you suppose she ran away?" Kohaku asked worriedly. He had just finished telling them about how he had found Rin. No wonder she had seemed familiar. Close to ten years have passed since Naraku's defeat. After the confrontation, Sesshoumaru-sama had taken off with Rin and Jaken without a parting word. That was the last time he had seen any of them. It came as a shock to know that Rin was with them right now. But where were Sesshoumaru and Jaken?

Sango shook her head slowly. "It isn't like Rin to run away. I remember she was totally devoted to Sesshoumaru."

Inuyasha snorted loudly. "Keh, knowing that bastard, I bet he threw her out because she displeased him somehow. You know how he is."

"I find that hard to believe," Kagome disagreed. "Sesshoumaru cares for her a great deal. He was always there when Rin was in trouble. And do you recall how he forgot his pride and risked his own life to get his arm back in order to save her?"

"Maybe she got lost. You know, they were probably out on a trip or something and she somehow strayed from their group," Shippou piped in. The kitsune demon stealthily plucked a piece of chicken off Miroku's plate.

The priest's forehead was furrowed in thought and ignored the little theft. "Hmm, perhaps you're right. But don't you think Sesshoumaru would have found her by now?"

"Well, I guess we would have to wait until she wakes up. Poor Rin.," Kagome said as she looked at the wall behind which the slumbering Rin was. "I hope nothing bad has happened."

Rin had heard enough. She couldn't let them go on and worry about her. She calmly placed her hand on the shoji door and tentatively slid it open. All eyes turned to her in surprise. Kagome was the first to recover.

"Oh so you're finally awake! How are you feeling? You must be hungry, come in and have something to eat. You must have heard us talking about you," she said with a shameful chuckle. "It has been somewhat of a shock seeing you here. We hope you don't mind."

Rin lowered her head meekly and stepped into the room. She looked around at the faces seated around the table. Kohaku was smiling encouragingly at her. "Please have a seat," he invited.

Sango nudged Miroku to make space for Rin. She sat down between Kagome and the taijiya.

Kagome reached for Rin's hand and patted it reassuringly. "We should get some food into you first, then we can talk about it if you like," she said soothingly. She didn't want to pressure the girl into telling them everything at once. They would wait, she would begin when she was ready.

Rin felt her eyes misting over. "Thank you," she said in a near whisper. Everyone was being so kind. Sango began piling food on her plate, and Shippou placed a bowl of rice in her hands. She remembered them all too well even though she had never been around them much back then. It all seemed like a lifetime ago. Ten years had elapsed, but still they were together. One happy family. Everyone looked exactly the same, except for Shippou, who had grown considerably taller, and he had a bushier tail. And Kohaku. He was a man now, he was tall, lean, and broad-shouldered. Rin recalled how strong and brave he was. In the past he had gotten her out of harm's way several times. Once, he had even journeyed with them in their search for Naraku. It was beyond her that she hadn't been able to recognize him when he rescued her from those animals. Rin swallowed at the lump in her throat and felt a sharp pain twist her insides. If only _he_ was here, god, how she missed him…she blinked quickly to keep the tears at bay and willed her lips to stretch into a smile.

She had not thanked Kohaku for saving her life. Balling her fists on her lap, she turned towards the young man and gave him a teary smile. "Thank you, Kohaku-kun. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you," she said with heartfelt gratitude.

Kohaku flushed to the roots of his hair. "It was nothing. You saved my life once too, remember? I would die before I let anything hurt you, surely you know that." Realizing that he had said far too much, he turned his gaze to the ceiling and fidgeted with his hair, laughing a bit to cover his embarrassment.

Inuyasha took one look at Kohaku and roared with laughter. "The lad has got the hots for you Rin, hehe! You'd better watch out!"

Kagome yanked on the dog demon's ear and he gave out a loud yelp. "Ooww!!! What the hell was that for?" he demanded angrily.

Choosing to ignore her husband, Kagome proceeded to eat her sushi. "He has such a foul mouth, I do apologize Rin. Oh well, I guess he will never learn." Smiling at Rin, she calmly filled a teacup and placed it in front of her. "You know, whatever it is that happened, we'd like you to know that you can stay here for as long as you like. We have plenty of room. You can share a room with Nishi, she had always wanted to have an older sister."

"Oh no, I wouldn't want to impose on you. You've done so much for me already, I'll be on my way in the morning," Rin protested. She had absolutely no idea where to go. The bag with her possessions in it had been lost when the coyotes were chasing her. Maybe they could spare her something to wear and some necessary items, but she didn't want them to think she was taking advantage of their hospitality.

Kagome waved her hands in the air dismissively. "Oh you silly child, we would love for you to stay! Now that that's settled, eat as much as you can. You're so thin the wind will blow you away!"

The banter continued endlessly around the table. It seemed as if nothing had changed for these people. But they were familiar, and they had been dear to her at one point in time. She didn't know how she would begin telling them about what had happened, but she would find a way. Timidly, she bit into some chicken. It had been quite some time since she left the castle and had eaten anything this delicious. She didn't realize how hungry she was. With renewed energy, she began to eat with relish. Surrounded by people who genuinely cared for her, she knew that somehow, everything would work itself out.

-o0o-

"I'm worried about her Inuyasha. What could possibly have happened to bring this about?"

They were standing by the lakeshore, staring up at the crescent moon. Inuyasha put his arms around Kagome and held her close. "That bastard, I knew it! I knew this would happen! A youkai and a human…it would never work out!" he said vehemently. His brother was such an unfeeling ass, Inuyasha knew in his gut that this was somehow all Sesshoumaru's fault.

Kagome turned in his arms. "How can you say that? We don't know what happened yet. It must have been too hurtful to talk about. And you can't say that a human and a demon could never work out. Look at us!" she cried.

Inuyasha's eyes softened at her outburst. "Well, we are the exception. Keh, I guess we'll just have to wait 'til he gets here. We'll see what he has to say."

Laying her head on his chest, Kagome sighed heavily. "I just hope she doesn't get hurt again. There's too much pain in her eyes and she's so young."

They stayed that way for a long time, until the cold night air forced them to seek the warmth of the house.

-o0o-

Well, that's it for now. Chappie 8 will be up in a few. Please don't forget to review this!

-bungeegum-


	8. Chapter 8

**Writer's Yaps: Oh my gosh, I know I haven't updated in like 2 months! I do apologize, it's just that I've been so busy with work and a heckuva lot of other stuff. Well, here's chapter 8 by the way, I hope you guys like it. Please read and review!**

**Eien Wo Shinjiteru**

**Chapter 8**

He had not come for her.

Which was just as well. In her mind, she kept telling herself that this was for the best. She had chosen to run away. Sesshoumaru-sama had always let her do what she wanted. But in the nether regions of her heart, she was deeply hurt. She fervently hoped that he would come to take her back. If he had showed up, he would simply tell her it would be her decision if she wanted to return with him or not. No questions asked.

Rin had been with the Inuyasha household for almost a month, and in that time she had come to love them all. They had treated her as one of the family, as if she had been living with them for years instead of weeks. She had yet to tell them what had happened, but not once did they pry or press her for details. They had been sympathetic but not overbearing in their concern. For that Rin was very grateful. She had grown close to them, especially the children, Inuyasha and Kagome's daughter Reika; and Sango and Miroku's seven year-old identical twins Kiyota and Hiroshi. The children were veritable imps and was a force to be reckoned with. They were a contrast of sorts. Reika had inherited her father's devil-may-care attitude and her mother's sweet, caring disposition. The twins, although you couldn't tell them apart in appearance, were as different as night and day. Kiyota was the more serious of the two, he had an unquenchable thirst for knowledge and was always asking questions. If he wasn't gallivanting about with his brother and Reika, you would find his face buried in a book. Hiroshi, however, never took his lessons seriously. He loved being outdoors and was always wrestling with someone, preferably his Uncle Inuyasha. The threesome had looked up at her with wide, questioning eyes the first time they met, and they had latched onto Rin and led her outside to show her the tree house their Uncle Kohaku had built exclusively for them. They had been sleeping over Kaede Oba-chan's place the night Rin arrived, so she wasn't able to meet them until the next morning. With the amazing perceptiveness of children, they had sensed her loneliness, so they did their best to distract her by engaging her to play silly harmless pranks on everyone in the house, Inuyasha being the favorite butt of their antics.

Kohaku. High up in the tree house, Rin's thoughts shifted to the handsome boy who had shown her such tenderness and concern. He was so kind and gentle. They were little more than children when they met all those years ago, when he had been an unwilling pawn in Naraku's web of evil. Everything that happened in the past seemed so far away now, as if it were all part of a strange dream.

A soft knock roused Rin from her reverie. Kohaku was standing on the topmost steps, only his upper body was visible. He shoved a large basket just inside the open doorway. "Er, may I come in?" he asked hesitantly.

"Of course." Rin answered, smiling. She dragged the basket over to the window. "What have you got in here?"

Kohaku scrambled over to her side and grinned. "I thought you might be hungry so I brought you dinner."

Rin looked at him gratefully. "That's very thoughtful of you." She flipped back the cloth cover and peered inside the basket. "Hmm, it smells so good.

"Let's see…we have spaghetti, fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and chocolate mousse for dessert," Kohaku said eagerly. He reached inside and withdrew several covered plates, two plastic cups, some chopsticks, a bread knife, a large bottle of soda, and the rest of the fare. He pointed to the bottle, "This is a drink from Kagome-sama's time. It's called soda. It has a strange taste but it's delicious, especially when it's cold. It goes well with the chicken," he said with a small chuckle.

"I've never heard of those before, but we do have chicken sometimes back-" she paused abruptly. She was going to say 'back home in the palace'. "Back then," she finished lamely. She began to unwrap the plates, hoping Kohaku would not notice.

Kohaku handed her a plate and chopsticks and ignored the slip. "Go ahead, have some of everything," he encouraged. "Here, you got to try this one." He put a huge dollop of mashed potatoes on her plate and smothered it with gravy. "The brown sauce is called gravy. It's made from the chicken drippings. You can also dip the chicken in it. The food from Kagome-sama's time is quite unusual, but they're very delicious."

"Oh it is wonderful!" Rin exclaimed. She dug into her plate eagerly, savoring everything Kohaku had brought.

They ate in companionable silence. Occasionally, they would look up at each other and smile. When the meal was over, Kohaku reached inside the basket again and brought out a deep dish with a flourish. "Ta-da! And now for the highlight of the evening…chocolate mousse!" He put a huge slice on two plates, placed a fork in each one and handed the other to her. "Here you go. This is a favorite back at the house. I had to be really quick or it would've all been gone, hehe."

Rin deftly cut a piece of the chocolate cake and raised it to her mouth. Reika had taught her to use a fork and she was used to it by now. The chocolate was smooth and sweet and melted in her mouth. "Oh! This is absolutely heavenly!" She closed her eyes as she slowly chewed, savoring the unfamiliar but exquisite taste on her tongue.

"Yes it is," Kohaku swallowed a lump in his throat as he gazed at Rin, mesmerized once again. She was so utterly beautiful. He was thankful for the dim light, as his face was heavily suffused with heat. Suddenly, he felt a flash of anger at Sesshoumaru. What had he done to cause this enchanting, spirited girl to run away? Kohaku knew he was being irrational. Rin hadn't told them about Sesshoumaru's part in this, but her face had clouded over when Inuyasha unfeelingly (but unintentionally) mentioned his brother once at the dinner table a couple of days back. Everyone had turned to Rin with stricken looks on their faces. Kagome had dug her elbows into Inuyasha's side and tried to cover the slip with a joke. Rin had kept her eyes on her plate and was silent for the rest of the meal. The subject of Sesshoumaru was never brought up again.

When they had finished eating, they put everything back in the basket and sat back by the window, gazing out at the moonlit night. There was a slight breeze, but it was relatively warm. Still, Kohaku retrieved a blanket from the basket and handed it to Rin. "Just in case you get chilled," he said.

Unexpectedly, Rin's eyes filled with tears. "Thank you," she said shakily, setting the blanket on her lap. "You have been so kind to me, everyone has been so utterly kind and understanding. I don't deserve to be here."

"There, there, please don't cry," Kohaku pleaded. He reached out and patted her hand awkwardly. "We love having you here. Everyone adores you. It doesn't matter what happened before. You will always have a place to stay here with us." _In fact, I never want you to leave, he added silently._

"I'm sorry," Rin swiped at her tears with the back of her hand. Kohaku had been there for her all this time. He had given her the courage to go on when everything was so bleak, doing whatever he could to make her smile and take her mind off her loneliness. She would be grateful to him forever. "Kohaku-kun, I-I want to thank you for everything you have done. If only if I could somehow make it up to you…"

He smiled gently and said, "Well, I would really like it if you smiled more often. For me, that would be enough." He didn't think his face could get any redder.

Rin placed her hand on top of his and held it tight. "It's just things happened so fast. Everything was different all of a sudden."

Kohaku shook his head vehemently. "No, please don't feel you owe it to me. You will tell me when you the time is right, but not before."

Taking a deep breath, Rin proceeded to tell him the horrifying events regarding her rape, the journey back to the castle, and the lonely weeks afterward. "I thought everything would somehow be back to normal with the passage of time, but it seemed to get worse. Her eyes were sad when she said this. "I was not allowed out of the palace grounds unlike before. Jaken-sama still felt as if everything was his fault. I tried several times to explain that I don't blame him for what happened, but he can't seem to get it through his head," she laughed harshly, staring sightlessly at the huge oak tree outside. "As for Sesshoumaru-sama…he-he has no need for me anymore."

"I am sure that is not the case. Sesshoumaru-sama cares for you, I've witnessed it before," Kohaku said feelingly. He placed his free hand on top of hers and squeezed it reassuringly. To his surprise, Rin turned to face him with a look of utter grief on her beautiful face. She shook her head slowly as tears poured silently down her cheeks. In a faint whisper she said, "There is no place for me in Sesshoumaru-sama's heart. He is betrothed to someone else. He would be married before the year is over."

-o0o-

Well, that's it for now. I hope you guys enjoyed that one. Please don't forget to tell me what you think. I'll try to update sooner! See ya around!

-bungeegum-


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